Saturday, November 14, 2020

Rudolph the Red-nosed Reigndeer Review

    So we've all probably watched the movie "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reigndeer", right? It's an absolute classic. I've discovered that nobody has done a proper review of it, though. They all seem to add so much plot that wasn't there, so I'm just going to review it beat for beat.

    So Rudolph the Red-nosed Reigndeer is a movie about Rudolph, a reigndeer with a bright red nose. Now, this nose is supposedly so bright that some people may say that it glows, but personally, I think he just had a cold.

    All of the other reigndeer were super toxic towards Rudolph, all because of his stuffy nose. They were all so scared of catching his germs that they wouldn't let him play with them in the official reigndeer games, even though he was allowed in by the official judges and those actually organizing the events.

    But that all changed when, on Christmas eve, Santa Claus decided to talk to one of the kids he's been creepily spying on, and told Rudolph that his nose is so bright it could light up the entire sky. Rudolph, not realizing this was an insult, got super excited, because he thought santa was asking for his help.

    Santa was so amused by this, as well as feeling sorry for Rudolph, that he actually decided to play along with it. He hooked Rudolph up to his sleigh, and attached a flashlight just outside of Rudolph's vision so Rudolph would think he was helping.

    When Rudolph got back to his home, Santa promptly told him not to tell anyone what happened, and Rudolph, being a child, did the exact opposite. He told everyone that he got to help Santa get all the presents to everyone, and because everyone in this universe is extremely shallow, they loved him because he got to help a celebrity. They all told Rudolph that he'd go down in history, and considering the fact that I'm writing this, I'd say he did.

    So, as for my review of it, I would say that Rudolph the Red-nosed Reigndeer is the greatest movie ever made, if only because the song is so catchy.

    Thank you for reading this, and goodnight.

Wednesday, November 04, 2020

Where have I been?

Now, many of you are hopefully asking "Where has Alex Alexander Ludd been, and why is he only now returning to the blogosphere?" I am, of course, here to answer that question.

I had the flu. Sorry about that.

Monday, October 26, 2020

What I'm looking for in a president

Looking for professional female, under 38 years old, large breasts.
Must have 5 years experience.
Body type doesn't matter.
Single or widowed preferred but divorced okay
Optional: named Jennifer Lopez
Interests include: scrumping within tasteful limits, ornithology, and protecting my intellectual properties to the best of your ability
Please respond with pictures by November 2nd.




Thursday, October 15, 2020

My best pleasures

Precipitation on flora and beards on young felines. Bright copper braziers and warm woolen gloves. Brown paper parcels wrapped up in twine, These are some favorite objects of mine. Babes in white togas With blue satin scarves, Frost that stays on my proboscis and mascara, Silver white Januaries That melt into the Paschal seasons, These are my favorite happiness reasons. When the canine chomps, When the wasp stings, When I'm feeling down, I simply remember this stuff that I like And then I'm as happy as a clown. 

 

Monday, October 12, 2020

It is of great importance for you to know this.


As We All Know, There Is, Once Again, An Election For president of the united states Happening Right Now.