Redtooth - Like Bluetooth, this allows wireless communications. The difference is, since it's red, it goes further, and is less noticable in certain places, such as the circus, or the theatre.
USB Floppy Drives - A drive that plugs into a computer's USB port that allows the usage of floppy disks. A single floppy disk holds only 1.4 Megabytes, but due to their inexpensive nature, a person could realistically have several thousand, provided they can store them, thus giving them a few gigabytes in which to put all their important JPGs and MP3s.
Medical Science - This will help me recover if, during my term, I am injured. This will take some of the load off of my Vice President's job.
PokéFurbyMon - A new combination of Pokémon and Furby, this will sell like hotcakes. I'll make a fortune, and the economy will be saved! Hurrah!
Charles in Charge season 2 DVD - Like PokéFurbyMon, this is guaranteed to be a best seller, except for adults. Stated by some guy I met on the street to be the product everyone wants, I'm sure this will sell like hotcakes, thus making me a fortune and saving the economy! Hurrah! (It IS technology, because it's a DVD)
Electic StaplerMatic - Basically, it's a stapler that automatically lines up the paper for you and staples it at just the press of a button. It can also sort papers by color, weight, and saturated fat content.
Singing Wall Bass - Just what everybody wants, this toy looks remarkably similar to a real fish, and will start singing as soon as you press a button, consider pressing a button, or even notice that there is a button. It also sings if you enter the room. While this product doesn't have MUCH market for deaf people, even they want it to show off their 1337 PHISHING skills.
So basically, technology is where the future is at. The reason I didn't put VCRs on the list, despite their inherent functionality, is because they never stop flashing 12:00. It's driving me crazy.
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5 comments:
The "12:00" should be blinking. If it isn't, then you are using Internet Explorer. For added security and more expandability, use Mozilla FireFox. Also, the blinking will work right with FireFox, or Netscape, or maybe AOL. Pretty much anything that isn't Internet Explorer.
This has been a paid advertisement by nobody. I did it of my own free will.
You suck.
Welcome back.
Did you say "good enough for me to get re-elected"? Let's just work on the initial election, hon.
Before Election: Talk about these strategies, thus getting me elected.
After Election: Implement these strategies, or something with some vague resemblance, thus getting me re-elected afterwards.
I should have made myself more clear. Clarity is one of my key strategies, you know.
I'm all for transparency.
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